Friday, June 2, 2017

Maggot-Slug

OK, we have hit our first real snag with the "go ahead and let our home go to hell while staying away and healing" plan.
Maggot-slug.
Because hell hath abundant insect life.
Horrified Child: "How did this happen?!?"
Calm Adult: "This is just a normal part of life."
Tweaking Adult: "Not in clean homes, it isn't!"
Calm Adult [wisely switching horses midstream]: "And that's why we all need to work together to keep things clean."
Calm Adult: "Now that you've pointed it out, how about leaving it there and I'll see if I can figure out a way to deal with it sometime later?"
Tweaking Adult: "... That is so not even an option."
Calm Adult [leaning in the kitchen doorway]: "So, how has the rest of your day gone?"
Tweaking Adult [in the middle of dealing with maggot-slug]: "This is not the time."
[Sixty seconds later]
Child: "Could you please-?"
Calm Adult: "Learn from my mistakes, son. Don't go in there right now."
Tweaking Adult [scrubbing frantically]: "Maggot-slug! Not the time!"
Epilogue:
Calm Adult: "So, what do you think it was feeding on?"
Still-tweaking Adult: "NEGLECT."

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